Friday, February 8, 2013

Go Fish

When you have a young child, you constantly have to say things like “don’t put that in your mouth.” “Don’t put that in your mouth, it has germs on it.” “Don’t put that in your mouth, it will cut your gums.” “Don’t put that in your mouth, it’s nasty.” You get my point. But when you have a dog…well, dogs are created to put everything in their mouths. If it smells remotely edible, or even if it doesn’t, there is a fairly good chance they are going to eat it anyways. And they’re going to eat it quickly, too. Sometimes you can catch them in the act and tell them no and they’ll leave it alone before they eat it. But other times, you either don’t see them fast enough or you don’t see them at all. And that is how Roman and I managed to charge $206.75 to our credit card just one day after paying it off last weekend.
We were at our Pastor’s house with the youth leaders working on some things for church. We had just finished up, so our youth leader, Johnny, decided to go fishing with Pastor’s kids down at their pond. Duke had come along with us and had enjoyed an afternoon of swimming in the pond, running really fast, and rolling in the tall grass. We let Duke go down to the pond with Johnny and the kids so he could play some more. After a short while, one of them caught a fish. A pretty big fish. So they decided to take a picture. One way or another, a fishing pole with chicken still on the hook was laid down in the grass. And just like that, they caught a dog. My dog. My dog who loves chicken and decided he wanted that piece of chicken laying there in the grass. Only except that chicken had a metal hook inside of it, which promptly game him a lip piercing. Thankfully, one of the kids saw him right as he took a bite and yelled “No Duke!” so he didn’t swallow the hook. Not so thankfully, the hook got stuck inside of his mouth instead.
Johnny has now been nominated to “Worst Dog-Sitter Ever”.
For whatever reason, they didn’t want to tell me that Duke had a hook stuck in his lip. They thought I would go all crazy psycho on them. I have no idea why they would think something like that. Dukey-face is only my fur-child. So naturally, they decided to try and remove the hook without telling me. But that didn’t work because he was, well, hooked. And fish hooks tend to not come back out after they hook into something….that’s kind of what they were created to do. You know, so you can catch fish. And this stubborn fish hook decided to fulfill its purpose and stay lodged in my dog’s mouth. Of course, Roman eventually had to tell me that even though my dog appeared to be acting normal (he was presently running around with a pine cone in his mouth); he actually had a fish hook stuck in his mouth. (And in case you were wondering, I did NOT go all crazy psycho.)
We briefly contemplated making Duke drink a beer so he would pass out, but then we decided that since we would have to shove the hook the rest of the way through his lip, we really needed to let a vet handle all that. (Calm down PETA, calm down.) Hence, the $206.75 charge that appeared on my credit card that night. Yay for emergency vet calls, puppy anesthesia, and puppy pain shots.
As for Duke? He’s 100% fine. According to the vet, dog’s mouths heal incredibly fast. So even though she had to make a small incision and pierce his lip all the way through to get the hook out, he didn’t require stitches and the swelling was gone in two days. In fact, he ate an entire rawhide bone the next day in under an hour like it was nothing.
Needless to say, I am praying for a much less eventful weekend that does not require me swiping my credit card again. Also, my dog is NEVER allowed to go fishing again. But he still loves chicken.
“Since they would not accept my advice and spurned my rebuek, they will eat the fruit of their ways and be filled with the fruit of their schemes.                           ~Proverbs 1:30-31

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