Weight Worries

Okay ladies, let’s talk weight…..

I know, I know, but don’t leave yet, just stick around for a bit, m’kay? (And guys, this post is not aimed at you, but it might be helpful for you to read and get inside the minds of the ladies in your life.)

I get it. I totally get it. We are surrounded by images of models and a trillion different ways that we do not measure up. I would LOVE for my tummy to be flatter, to achieve the *ahem* “thigh gap” that alluded me as soon as I graduated high school, for my skin to be clearer…and about ten shades tanner, and for my hair to do those big beautiful curls sported by the runway chicks. I have spent years, YEARS, watching other women around me and being envious of not having cool clothes like her, or not having a tighter backside like her, or not having super white teeth like her.

But frankly, I’m getting pretty tired of it. And I’m pretty sure, most of you are too. I’m pretty sure that I can say women today are tired of seeing all the ways they don’t measure up, making new year’s resolutions every year to try and fix all the ways they don’t measure up, and then giving up after a few weeks because the difference between us  and them is just too much.

Yesterday, I was surfing Pinterest during my lunch break. Particularly, the health & fitness board of Pinterest. I’ve been going to the gym and getting back into running, so I like browsing through some of the motivational fitness stuff online to keep me excited about fitness. The more time I spend on that board, though, the more troubled I become. Why? Because so much of the pictures that are getting pinned by my friends are pictures of women that, quite frankly, are not truly healthy.

They are bone thin. A whisp of a woman. With impeccable make-up and designer clothing. With teeth that probably cost thousands to get that white, and not a single wrinkle in sight. Can I tell you a secret? We won’t ever make it to that.

 This is not meant to discourage you, this is meant to set you free. Photoshop doesn’t work in real life. So why are we using Photo-shopped pictures of women who eat cotton balls soaked in orange juice as motivation for our weight loss journey. (That’s not sarcasm, look it up. These models go to extremes to be that thin.) I’m seeing pins of workouts supposedly used by Victoria Secret Models, and pictures of girls that are so tiny I can see their hip bones jutting out over their bikini bottoms. And this is what we are using for inspiration?

The insanity has got to stop.

I’m not saying that we shouldn’t strive for healthiness. I’m not saying that wanting to be a little slimmer around the waistline is sinful. I’m all for some cutbacks in sugar consumption and more exercise for our country, where obesity and diabetes and heart disease runs rampant. But before we ever start any kind of weight loss journey or look for any kind of inspiration, we have got to realize one thing:

We are most beautiful when we are us.

No one has that same beautiful smile as you. No one has that same freckle pattern across her nose. You are uniquely you, and as much as the world screams at us to look a certain way, we should not listen. Being unique is special. It’s what makes us human. I can line up a herd of elephants and they will pretty much look exactly the same…..same color, same size, same facial structure. Sure, there might be a few small differences because of genetics, but they are basically the same. But humans? Line up all of the humans in your office and you will see a group of people who are all uniquely individual. There will be different eye color, skin color, body shape, facial structure, hair color….you get the point. God put a whole lot more creativity into the creation of humans than He did any other creature that walks this earth. Why? Because we are His most prized creation! He didn’t want a group of robots that had the exact same bone-thin body structure, bleach-white teeth, and wavy blonde hair! He wanted you. Beautiful, wonderful, unique, you.

Does He want us to be healthy? Of course! He wants us to enjoy the fullness of life, and He wants us to be good stewards over what He gave us. But the definition of “healthy” is not often found on Pinterest, and I don’t think it’s ever found on a Hollywood runway.

This year, I didn’t do a New Year’s Resolution, per se. Instead, I just decided that 2014 was going to be a year that I took on a healthier lifestyle. I decided that for once, I was just going to try to be a happier, healthier me. If I wind up a few pounds lighter at the end of the year, great. But if not, as long as I am feeling happier and healthier, I will consider this goal met.

What has this meant for me? Well, so far, it has meant that I’ve carved some time out to go running and go to the gym. Exercise helps tremendously with stress relief for me, so I’m feeling so much better. It is also essential that I keep my right leg strong now that I’ve had my knee surgery, and so far it is holding up really well! It’s also meant that I’ve stopped taking all fertility medications, because they were making me feel depressed and emotional. I’ve cut way back on Diet Cokes and have tried drinking more water. But I totally ate that chocolate covered donut on Saturday because I wanted to. I’m going back to the chiropractor because that doctor has some sort of crazy talent for making my back cooperate with the rest of my body. I’ve started reading books again and painting some crafty stuff. I slept in until 1:30 Saturday afternoon because I could. I read my Bible more, crank up my music in the car louder, and started “date night” again with Roman.  

But I am unique, and my picture of healthy may look entirely different from yours. It may mean that you play with your kids a little longer in the backyard. It may mean that you go buy some new clothes to help you feel more confident in your own skin. It may mean that you stop eating sugar for a little white to get better control over your eating habits. I have no idea what being healthy will look like for you, and guess what? Neither does Pinterest. Or Hollywood. Or those magazines in the line at the grocery store? Why? Because they are not you. They are not living your life. They have no idea what your schedule looks like and what you have the time/strength/energy/schedule to do.

So sure, browse Pinterest for some motivational quotes. Follow some blogs that have some good exercise routines that fit your life. But don’t take it any farther than that. Don’t let these images of “perfection” cloud your mind and choke out who you are as a daughter of Christ.

Be you. Be unique. Because you are, in fact, beautiful.

PS: To any of the guys who stuck with me on this one….tell the wife/mother/sisters in your life that they are beautiful. It will mean the world to them.

“Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.” ~1 Peter 3: 3-4

Monday Musings

Here is a random conglomerate of thoughts that I put together for your Monday:

(I know, you can’t get over the fact that I knew the proper usage of the word “conglomerate”. Just move along, m’kay?)

The Super Bowl…..

Lame. Really lame. Except for the half-time show. That part was pretty good, but only because I really like Bruno Mars (not what he stands for, but let’s face it, the guy can sing and he’s an excellent entertainer) and there was (surprisingly) no nudity. Unless you count the shirtless Red Hot Chili Peppers, but then, those guys are always weird. So they don’t count.

Of Bruno Mars….

I posted the link on my personal Facebook page last night, but I thought it was worth repeating. Lisa Baker wrote an awesome post…..What to Teach your Daughter about Bruno Mars and Love Songs. 

Sure, lyrics like “when I see your face, there’s not a thing that I would change” make us ladies feel all warm and fuzzy inside, but the truth is that true love is not always warm and fuzzy. True love is really hard work, and you need a man that is going to do more than offer up poetic lyrics. You need a man that is willing to fight hard to keep a marriage alive, because some days it truly is a fight. Yes, there will also be those warm and fuzzy times too. And over the years you will (hopefully) find that there are more warm and fuzzy times than fight times. You just have to work to get to that point….and Hollywood never shows that side of love.

On a more positive note…..

This video is making its rounds on the Internet, especially since the Seahawks won the Super Bowl, but if you haven’t seen it, it is totally worth sixty seconds of your time:

#TrustYourPower – NFL’s Derrick Coleman, Seattle Seahawks

“They told me I was a lost cause. But I’ve been deaf since I was 3…so I didn’t listen.”

Click here to watch the video:#TrustYourPower

What more can I say? I love stories like this. They show my generation and the one coming up behind me that hard work and dedication truly can pay off. They show us to ignore the negativity that society likes to dish on us and chase after our dreams anyways. Also, the video makes me glad that the Seahawks won.

The Super Bowl commercials….

Lame. Really lame. Note: I really hate football. And all other televised sports events. Except for the Triple Crown and the Olympics…..those are okay. So when I am *forced* to watch the Super Bowl, I have high expectations for the entertaining commercials that usually air during the game.

Only except this year they were pretty lame. I only had a few favorites: The Doberhuahua commercial (hilarious), and the two Budweiser commercials. #SoluteASoldier made me cry like a little girl. And then the other commercial with the puppy and the Clydesdales was just adorable. Because puppies and horses. Enough said. (PS: I do not support Budweiser in any way, ever. But they do make some pretty awesome commercials.)

I love my husband, and here is one reason why….

Roman is not a sports watcher (thank God.) Occasionally he will ask to watch a baseball game and he always watches the Super Bowl and the BCS championship (did I say that right??), but in general my life is not filled with TV broadcasts of games and endless chatter about who should beat who and why that man in the shiny pants just tackled the other man in the shiny pants and why it was a good deed. Praise God, He was definitely looking out for me when He created Mr. Casterline.

Since my husband really doesn’t care all that much about sports, his reasoning for which team to cheer for was this: I will cheer for the Broncos because Broncos starts with a “B” and my last name starts with a “C” and “B” is right next to “C” in the alphabet.

Glorious reasoning. You can totally see why we are perfect for each other, right? I can. Except, I guess we should have been cheering for the Seahawks because their name starts with an “S” and so does mine. Oh well, better luck next year!

Enough about the Super Bowl….

My dog was standing in the doorway the other day and shook his head. When he did, he shook it so hard that he accidentally slammed his head into the side of the doorway. He scared himself so bad that he tucked his tail and hid in the corner for five minutes. I could not. stop. laughing.

Last week….

I wrote a post called “Church, We Have an Emergency.” It was kind of long, but I felt like it was really important and needed to be said. If you missed it, check it out!  :)

Okay, I think I’ll stop now. I’ll end on the Scripture verse that I used to open service yesterday at church, because it’s a really good one.

“Though you have not seen Him, you love Him. Though you do not now see Him, you believe in Him and rejoice with joy that is inexpressible and filled with glory, obtaining the outcome of your faith, the salvation of your souls.”  ~1 Peter 1:8-9

Church, We Have an Emergency

Today, I read a post from We are that Family: One of the Best Things We Can Do for Our Kids in this Culture War. I shared her post to my Facebook page with a quote from the article:

“There’s all this crazy research on why so many kids are leaving the church once they can (every 6 in 10). Why? Some are leaving because it’s the first time they have the freedom to do so. But I think most leave because they don’t know Jesus. They have heard about him their whole lives. They have the t-shirt. But it’s not that personal. I don’t know if there’s a right way to go about it. But I do know it’s not about rules, it’s about relationship.” 

I don’t have kids yet, but this article really hit home for me. I grew up in a Christian family and have attended church since the day I was born. I went to a Christian school from the time I was three to the time I graduated high school. Attending a Christian school meant that we had to attend a Bible class every day of every school year, all of the curriculum was based on Christianity, we had a chapel service every Thursday morning, and we had a very strict code of conduct. You would expect to see lots of great Christian kids graduating from this institution, seeing as how we practically breathed God every day of our education, but the reality is quite different. Out of my graduated class of 33, I can probably count on one hand how many of us are actively pursuing Christ.

The problem is, most of the class would probably say that they still believed in God if you asked them, but if you look at their current life choices you would see something quite different.

One of my classmates is hooked on drugs. Many of them are hooked on alcohol. Some are living with their boyfriends/girlfriends. It’s like when my class entered the college scene they also entered a reality show called “Christian Kids Gone Wild” or something. And the same holds true for the classes that graduated before us and the classes that have graduated after us.

But why?

Yes, you might be able to contribute some of this to their home life. After all, the parents are the most influential in the lives of children. But still, when you are taught day in and day out about God, why are so many abandoning their faith as soon as they walk out of the door?

I think that last sentence answered the question…..it’s because we were taught about God, but not necessarily taught how to foster a relationship with God. There is a big difference between knowing about God’s existence and the historical aspects behind His Word, and the pursuit of His heart.

Now, please don’t think I’m blaming my high school for all of this, because the same statistics hold true for kids who enter college and leave their church youth group. We see the majority of these kids leaving the church entirely just as soon as they head off to college. We might see them again once they have kids of their own, but for the next few years they are “living large” and “partying it up” and “doing what they want to do because no one can tell them how to live their lives.”

This epidemic isn’t just within Christian schools, it’s a disease within the Church as a whole, and it needs to stop. The truth is, if this continues we are going to wind up missing an entire generation of young people. If our youth are graduating high school and leaving the church, never to be seen again, then what about when they have kids? I shudder to think of the answer.

So what’s the answer? Honestly, I’m not entirely sure. This post is more of a “get you thinking” post rather than a “here is the problem and I have the answer” post. But I can tell you that as parents, we have got to start exemplifying a relationship with Christ. And as a Church, as have also got to start exemplifying a relationship with Christ.

We can’t just teach our young people about God, we have to show them God. We have to show them that we are faithful with our tithes. We need to demonstrate prayer time. They need to see us reading our Bibles. They need to see us trusting God when money is tight. They need to see us serving God in our church and in our communities. They need to see us truly worshipping Him, and not just during church services on Sunday morning.

Will this completely heal the disease? No, it won’t. Because at the end of the day our children have to make the choice to follow Christ, and we live in a culture that is extremely hostile towards our faith. But like I said earlier, parents are the most influential in the lives of their children. So if we genuinely pursue Christ and they see that, then we know we have done all that we can do to train them up in the ways of God. We are giving them every opportunity and every example of what Christianity should look like, rather than just giving them a list of do’s and don’ts and expecting them to follow that when they enter the (hostile) college community.

I don’t know what pursuing Christ will look like for your family. Frankly, it really doesn’t matter what I think it should look like. Every family will do things differently, and that’s fine. One family might start a daily devotional at the table after dinner. Another family might make it a point to pray with each of their children when they tuck them in at night. Another family might volunteer at a homeless shelter once a month. The point is not necessarily what you do; it’s just that you do something on a regular basis to demonstrate a relationship with Christ.

And for the record, it doesn’t matter how old your kids are. If they are still living under your roof, you can still make some changes. And even if your kids have already moved out and started college, you can always keep them in prayer and ask that God speak into their lives and that they would be sensitive to His calling.

Again, this post isn’t really a “here is the problem and I have the answer” post. Shoot, I don’t even have kids of my own yet, so you might be sitting there thinking “who does this girl think she is telling me how to raise my children???” This was not meant to be a post where I bash parents everywhere and try to heap shame and guilt on your heads.

But, we have a serious problem in the Church today. And recognizing that problem and thinking about how to correct it is the first step towards recovery.

“If My people, who are called by My name, will humble themselves and pray and seek My face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, and I will forgive their sin and will heal their land.”  ~2 Chronicles 7:14

What is my calling, after all?

A couple of years ago, I was really struggling. I was in the middle of college, and quickly realizing that accounting was NOT the major I should have gone to school for. I was barely passing the advanced accounting and tax courses, which was pretty odd for a 3.9 GPA high school graduate, and I hated every second of it. To make matters worse, I was only a few semesters away from that coveted four-year degree, so I had already made the decision to just dig my heels in and graduate with my current major. Changing my major would have tacked on another two years of classes, and I was ready. to. graduate.

My decision was causing me a lot of internal turmoil, though. Am I screwing up my future by getting a degree in something I won’t ever use? Am I just blind and not seeing that my purpose in life is to be an accountant? And if I am making the wrong choice, what should my new major be? Journalism? Spanish? Basket-weaving? Teaching? What IN THE WORLD does God want me to do? What is my purpose? What is my calling? Sure He has something “cooler” in store for me than just accounting, right???? Tack on the fact that I was working a job that I did not enjoy with any foreseeable way out, and you have a recipe for one very conflicted 21 year old woman.

Fast forward almost three years and you find me in a happier job, with that high & mighty four-year degree hidden somewhere in my office at home. But still, I am in an in-between phase. I kindof-sortof wish that I had changed my major (to journalism), even though it means I would’ve just been graduating from college this semester (gross). And although I am in a much happier place, my ultimate goal is still to be a stay-at-home mom and not sitting in the “cube farm” for nine hours every day. With our current infertility struggle added in, you now have a recipe for a pretty frustrated almost-24 year old woman.

But thankfully, I have learned my lesson on being content with where I am in life. It was a hard lesson to learn….especially when the infertility stuff got added into the mix, but it was learned. One thing that has helped me come to peace with everything are the wise words that I heard at a youth conference a year or two ago. They were spoken by the wife of our Georgia Assemblies of God District Youth Director, and although she was addressing a group of tween girls (I was there as a chaperone), they really meant a lot to me as well. Paraphrasing, she said that we don’t need to have our “purpose” or our “calling” figured out for the rest of our lives. As we go through the seasons of life, it can change. God calls us to do different things…..rarely does He ever say “this is the one thing I want you to do until the day you die”, and if He did He would surely make that plain to us. Instead, we should be examining where we are in our lives and ask the simple question “what do You want from me in this season?”  She then gave examples of how she went from being a young wife, to a working wife, to a stay-at-home mom to her children, to a youth pastor’s wife, back to a working wife (while still being a youth pastor’s wife), and now to being the wife of the District Youth Director and speaking at youth events all over the state. (I may or may not have screwed up the order in which she said all that, but you get my point.) She has moved throughout many different seasons and callings in her life, and she is certain that as she gets older she will move through more.

Those were such freeing words for me to hear! After quite some time of struggling to figure out what my “true calling” was in life, I finally heard from a trusted sister in Christ that I only needed to be concerned with where God had me right now. Allowing that to sink in and apply to my life has also allowed me to learn to be content with where I am right now. Right now, I am a wife, an employee, a worship leader, and a church secretary….but who knows what the future may hold? Next year I may be a wife, a stay-at-home mom to a baby, and an author of a new book. Or I could be a wife, and a zookeeper to a bunch of tigers (my DREAM job).

And for the record, I no longer believe I “screwed up my destiny” by getting a degree in something I have no intentions of using. Who knows? God may have a plan for that degree in my future after all, but even if He doesn’t, His plan for my life is not bound by a piece of paper given to me by a college that later gets stuffed in my office. He is the only One with the authority to open or close the doors in my life. Part of this thing we call “faith” is realizing that we don’t hold our own futures, God does. And we have to trust that He has a plan, that He sees the full picture, and that He is going to guide us where we need to go.

I see a lot of young people (particularly in the Church) getting pressured to pick a degree and a career and figure out what they want to do the whole rest of their lives. Shoot, I was one of those young people just six years ago. In the church, we are constantly asking our young folks to discern God’s purpose for their lives.

I think, perhaps, we need to change how we talk to our young people. Rather than asking them what they think God has planned as their life’s purpose, how about asking them where they feel God leading them next? Rather than asking them what career they want to pursue until they retire, how about asking them what jobs sound interesting to them right now? Rather than forcing our young adults into picking a college major, why not letting them go for a General Studies degree and then decide on a major after they get a feel for what they might enjoy? Sure, some young people know exactly what they should do because God tells them upfront, but the majority don’t. Because the majority of the time, God doesn’t reveal the whole picture at once. Instead, He gives us one door at a time as He leads us through the hallways of His plan.

I suppose I should wrap this up, since I’m way past 1,000 words now. I guess what I’m really trying to say is this:

-Young people, it’s okay to not know your whole life’s plan.  Just figure out which door God is leading you through right now. He’ll give you the next step when it’s time, just trust in Him.

-Not-so-young people, embrace where you are in this season of life. Know that God has placed you here for a reason, but also know that God may place another call on your heart at a later time. Work for His kingdom with everything you have, and seek to do His will. You can’t go wrong if you do that! Trust that He will place you where He needs you as you go through life.

“By faith Abraham, when called to go to a place he would later receive as his inheritance, obeyed and went, even though he did not know where he was going. By faith he made his home in the promised land like a stranger in a foreign country; he lived in tents, as did Isaac and Jacob, who were heirs with him of the same promise. For he was looking forward to the city with foundations, whose architect and builder is God. And by faith even Sarah, who was past childbearing age, was enabled to bear children because she considered Him faithful who had made the promise. And so from this one man, and he as good as dead, came descendants as numerous as the stars in the sky and as countless as the sand on the seashore. All these people were still living by faith when they died. They did not receive the things promised; they only saw them and welcomed them from a distance, admitting that they were foreigners and strangers on earth. People who say such things show that they are looking for a country of their own. If they had been thinking of the country they had left, they would have had opportunity to return. Instead, they were longing for a better country—a heavenly one. Therefore God is not ashamed to be called their God, for He has prepared a city for them.” ~Hebrews 11:8-16

Overcoming Guilt

I woke up Sunday morning, ready to start my day.

But within minutes, my mind was assaulted with shame and guilt.

I got in the shower and tried to hurry while the enemy dragged up sins from my past....things that I have done that I haven't thought about in years. He drove those failures deep into my soul and by the time I got out of the shower, I wanted to just skip church and crawl back into bed.

Through all of the noise in my head, I felt God calling me to meet with Him. I quickly grabbed my Bible and the devotional I'm currently working through (Whispers of Hope by Beth Moore) and headed to the kitchen table. 

“This is the message we have heard from Him and proclaim to you, that God is light, and in Him is no darkness at all.  If we say we have fellowship with Him while we walk in darkness, we lie and do not practice the truth.  But if we walk in the light, as He is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus His Son cleanses us from all sin.  If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us.
 If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.  If we say we have not sinned, we make Him a liar, and His word is not in us.”  ~1 John 1:5-10
The passage of Scripture for yesterday's devotion was undeniably perfect and divinely appointed. Beth went on in the devotion to talk about how the enemy will try to drag us down, to make us feel so guilty and full of shame that he stops us from doing any work for the Kingdom of God. God opened my eyes to the mental and spiritual assault that was being launched, and I immediately claimed 1 John 1 over my life.

Maybe this morning you are going through the same thing. Maybe you woke up this morning and as soon as your feet hit the floor the enemy launched his attack. Maybe you don't feel like you are truly forgiven for that thing you did last month, or last year, or three years ago.

If so, I hope that you will take this passage of Scripture and declare it in your life because there is no sin too great that He cannot forgive! Don't let the enemy shove shame and guilt in your face for something that God has already cleansed from your heart! We are overcomers through the blood of the Lamb!

Happy Monday, everyone! I hope we all have a great week!  :)  :)

"If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness." ~1 John 1:9

2014 Financial Update

The last time I posted about finances was in November (if you missed it, you can check it out here.) Since we are starting the New Year, I figured now would be a good time to share where we are. Also, we just met one of the goals today, and I’m really excited to tell you!!

Here are our current financial goals:

Goal #1: Pay off student loan by February of 2015.

Goal #2: Pay off credit card and car by June of 2014.

Goal #3: Pay off credit line by January of 2014.  MET!!!!  :)   :)   :)

Goal #4: Have $3,000 in savings by end of 2014.

Goal #5: Pay off couch loan by July of 2014.

Goal #6: Be 100% debt-free by February of 2015.

Let me tell you, it feels SO GOOD to finally have one debt item paid off!

So far we are tracking on all of the other goals, except Goal #4. We have a good bit to go if we are going to meet that one, but I’m hoping that we can play catch-up with our tax refund next month. I can’t wait to get everything in there and see what we’ll get back. (We always over-pay with our deduction percentage, so I know we will get a refund. Some people don’t like to do that, but for us, it’s really nice to get that big tax refund in the mail. It’s kind of like putting money in a savings account where we can’t touch it, because we’ll use that money for car repairs, savings, and vacations.)

I also added some things to our budget for 2014...

The first is a monthly date night. Roman and I are really bad about not budgeting for one, so then we only take one when someone gives us a gift card or when Roman makes extra commission for the month. Now we have an actual budget line for date nights in our budget, and my goal is, no matter what, for us to go out on a date. If you’re married, you definitely need to do this!!

The second thing I added is for Roman and me to get $20 a piece each month for whatever we want. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve wanted to break the budget so I could buy a new book or a new pair of shoes. Now, I won’t have to because I’ll have that little bit of money each month to spend on whatever catches my eye (without feeling guilty about it.) Now that we are finally making some progress, I feel like this is a good thing to do in order to keep us on track and to keep us from getting frustrated.

I also increased our grocery budget amount. One of the things that Dave Ramsey talks about is if you are consistently going over budget in a certain category, then you probably just need to raise the amount. You can only cut so much before you’ve cut too much and you’ve created a number that is just not realistic, and I think I’ve done that in our grocery budget. I’ve consistently gone over budget with our groceries almost every month, even though I’ve done meal planning and have tried to keep extra un-needed purchases out. So I finally did some re-working and increased that grocery amount for the month to give us some more wiggle room. Hopefully that will do the trick!

If all goes well, then by June of this year (only five more months away!) we will have both my car and the credit card paid off. And then the month after that, we’ll have the couch loan paid off, leaving us only with the student loan. A year from today we will only be one payment away from being 100% debt free. I’m getting pretty excited!!!

“Keep your life free from the love of money, and be content with what you have.” ~Hebrews 13:5

Happy New Year!

Happy New Year, everyone!!

It’s that time of the year, where all the women vow to be skinnier by summer time and all the men vow to…..actually, I don’t know what men vow to do. Anyways. And so that means it is also the time of year for me to go through what my resolutions were last year, whether or not we were successful, and then list out my resolutions for 2014. So without further ado…

2013 Resolutions

Resolution #1: Lose the college fifteen

Success? HA! Try again. I gained a little more weight rather than losing any. I blame it on the infertility drugs my doctor had me on. Not. My. Fault.

Resolution #2: Be on time for stuff

Success? Yes, surprisingly. I have finally managed to get my sleepy behind out of bed on time and make it to work at 8 rather than *ahem* 8:20. Yay me!

Resolution #3: Read the entire Bible

Success? Sadly, no. I was doing really well for about four months, and then I fell off the wagon. And there’s nothing I can blame it on except myself.

2014 Resolutions

Resolution #1: Be healthier

I don’t just want to lose weight, I want to be good to myself. I want to get more sleep. I want to drink more water. I want to have a regular exercise routine. I want to get my hair trimmed more than twice a year (good Lord the split ends I have right now). I want to cook and eat good food. I want to build my immune system up so that maybe, just maybe, I can not have 8 sinus infections throughout the year. I want to start going back to the chiropractor because man, I feel so much better when I do.  

Perhaps this isn’t exactly a clear resolution, because there isn’t really an actual finish line that I can point to and say “this is where I want to be by December 31^st”, but I think the overall concept of being healthier will really work better for me. You know I’ll keep you posted!  ;)

Resolution #2: Have a consistent devotional time

Now that I’ve managed to figure out the whole being-on-time-for-work thing, I really want to take it another step further and wake up early enough to have a morning devotional time. As a Christian and as a worship leader, it embarrasses me to no end to admit to you that I have no set time for Scripture reading and prayer. It is sorely lacking in my life, and I really feel like I should be starting my days off connecting with God rather than going through my to-do list for the day. I bought a ten-week devotional book, “Whispers of Hope” by Beth Moore and so far it is AMAZING. I can’t wait to see my relationship with God grow deeper in 2014.

Resolutions #3: Be content

Here’s another one of those not-really-clear ones….sorry about that.

If I were being honest, 2013 really wasn’t a great year for me. I spent a LOT of my time going to the fertility doctor, taking tests, counting days, and stressing over whether or not the pregnancy test would be positive. I spent much of 2013 on an emotional roller coaster because of all of the hormones I was taking and just the stress of it all.

I’m not doing 2014 like that.

Roman and I have made the decision that in 2014, I will not be taking any of the medicines or going to the doctor every other day. All of that stuff caused so much emotional damage and spiritual damage to us both (particularly me), and right now we’re taking the time to heal from it all.

So for 2014, my goal is just to live in the moment. Roman and I are in the prime of our youth, and will be celebrating our four-year anniversary this year. I want to fill the year with good memories, not bad ones. I want to enjoy the vacations we take. I want to go out and do something exciting. I want to just enjoy being married to him and living life together, not stressing over whether or not we’ll get pregnant this month.

Besides, God doesn’t need me to be on Clomid for me to get pregnant anyways. This year, I’m going to trust in His timing and in His plan for me, and I’m going to operate in His joy as I go through the year.

So there you have it folks! What about you? Any resolutions going on in your house? Feel free to share in the comments!  :)

“Nehemiah said, ‘Go and enjoy choice food and sweet drinks, and send some to those who have nothing prepared. This day is holy to our Lord. Do not grieve, for the joy of the Lord is your strength.’” ~Nehemiah 8:10