I believe it is high time we set some things straight. You have been bothering me for quite some time on many different issues, so perhaps if you got to know me better you would leave me alone. If not, I will at least have the comfort of getting this off of my chest.
I am not a model. I am not six feet tall, and my pants are much larger than a size zero. My hair has a mind of its own, and my teeth are not as white as a sheet of paper. I cannot wear ten-inch heels, and I prefer to cover up certain regions of my body unless I am at home with my husband. I care more about my beauty on the inside than I do my beauty on the outside.
I am not some kind of superwoman. I do not care if I become CEO of a company. I do not care if I ever make triple digits. I do not care if I have that name-brand purse or fancy car. I am not striving for earthly riches. I am lucky if I can even wake up on time and get to work with some sort of make-up on my face and a matching pair of shoes on my feet. Some women are more than capable to handle things like that, but that is just not my cup of tea. I am not meant to run a company of 3,000 people. That would be disastrous for all parties involved.
And while I'm talking about all of that, let me just say this: I probably will never get my Master's degree. I am sorry that you believe education is the only way to be successful. I paid my dues and worked hard for my Bachelor's and unless things drastically change in my life, this is the highest degree I will ever receive. If this is not good enough for you, then get over it. I know Someone who is able to take five loaves of bread and feed thousands. Figure that one out. I am sure He can use my education for what He wants.
I refuse to be some sort of fierce, controlling woman who rules over my husband. He is the leader of my family and always will be. I am his helper. And I will not stand for this new idea that women are higher than men and that men are dumb creatures who are lazy and whose sole purpose in life is to make us happy and help populate the earth. All of that is hogwash, and I will not believe it. I will respect my husband. I will pray for him. I will be his helper and his support. I will not let him walk on me like a door mat, but he will be the master of our home. I know this is a crazy thing to believe, but things are meant to be this way and homes function much better when households operate like this.
I am not perfect. I am not the most beautiful in the world. I can not run the fastest, jump the highest, sing the prettiest, or be the funniest. I am just me. But for whatever reason, you want me to forget the me that I am and turn into a me that isn't me. Catch my drift? But I am the me that I was created to be and you cannot take me away from me.
You see, here's the thing. There is a God. A God that you care nothing about, but He means the world to me. And the thing is, I care a whole lot more about what He thinks about me than what anyone else thinks about me. What does He think about me, you may ask?
He thinks I am beautiful. He thinks I am smart. He thinks I am special. And He thinks that I spend way to much time thinking about what others think. And He is right about all of these things. And do you know what else? He thinks the same thing about every other human being that He has ever created. And He doesn't just think all of these things, He shows me the love that proves His thoughts. I will never be enough for you, world, but I am already exactly what He wants, exactly as I am.
So this is me, telling you, that I could really care less what you say about me. You can call me ugly. You can call me fat. You can tell me that I need to wax my eyebrows. You can tell me to get more education. You can tell me to revolve my life around my job. You can tell me to lord over my husband with pride and a mean spirit. And you can tell me these things as many times as you want to.
But your voice will fall on deaf ears. Because my ears are listening to the melody that Jesus sings to me everyday. And it is far sweeter than your trash. I would tell you I'm sorry, but I'm really not sorry at all. Because life is so much better when I'm singing a song with my Creator.
"A wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies. Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value. She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life. She selects wool and flax and works with eager hands. She is like the merchant ships, bringing her food from afar. She gets up while it is still night; she provides food for her family and portions for her female servants. She considers a field and buys it; out of her earnings she plants a vineyard. She sets about her work vigorously; her arms are strong for her tasks. She sees that her trading is profitable, and her lamp does not go out at night. In her hand she holds the distaff and grasps the spindle with her fingers. She opens her arms to the poor and extends her hands to the needy. When it snows, she has no fear for her household; for all of them are clothed in scarlet. She makes coverings for her bed; she is clothed in fine linen and purple. Her husband is respected at the city gate, where he takes his seat among the elders of the land. She makes linen garments and sells them, and supplies the merchants with sashes. She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come. She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue. She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her: “Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all.”
Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. Honor her for all that her hands have done, and let her works bring her praise at the city gate." ~Provers 31:10-31